Model: b3earded dragon_2021 (Technology Review)
My bearded dragon is a great pet but he’s very glitchy. It’s clear that he is made of outdated technology, but his developers never bothered to update the model because there was no need to. I would like to explain some glitches my bearded dragon has been experiencing:
1: Running into walls. The eyesight navigation feature seems to be limited and is not trustworthy. It recognizes rough or dark surfaces but is incapable of recognizing surfaces that are textureless and colourless. Please update this.
2: Head bobbing at random objects. The dominance aggression feature works fine against other bearded dragons in the wild, but the threat recognizer, which is linked to it, is very faulty. As a result, inanimate objects are frequently misidentified as threats. This feature needs patching.
3: Attempting to dig on hard surfaces. The loose substance identifier seems to work fine - but as is common with this model of reptile - it is not very accurate nor refined. The bearded dragon will sometimes try to dig on white walls, because it’s programming is incapable of understanding them. If the bearded dragon is startled, it might attempt to dig a hole on it’s rock, which is of course impossible. Some patching might be needed to help refine this feature.
4: Trying to climb unclimbable surfaces. This often directly coincides with the inability to understand walls - potentially the most common glitch/programming failure of the bearded dragon. Since walls are often not recognized, other features are often reverted to (digging, climbing, leaping). Walls are unclimbable for bearded dragons unless they are highly grip-able, but bearded dragons still attempt to climb them. My suggestion would be to make a fix where instead of reverting to other features, the bearded dragon feels a desire to move away from the wall after it bumps into it. Even this could help improve performance a lot.
Those are the glitches I thought were worth mentioning. Other features seem to work fine. Emotional communication in this model is on-point. The blackening beard feature combined with head bobbing and hand-waving makes it much more easier to understand the bearded dragon’s emotions, compared to other reptiles. Despite the faults, it is a good system and effective for owners.
The food recognition feature is a little underdeveloped but still good enough that I didn’t put it on the list. New food items are learned correctly, processed, and filed away. When identified again, providing the bearded dragon enjoys the taste, the food will be highly enticing to them. My only issue is that it is possible for non-food objects to be misidentified as food, occasionally. This happens quite rarely, though, and with caution it is easy to avoid. So no real issues with this feature.
Finally, the observation abilities are respectable and it is clear that the bearded dragon processes movement all across the room, and is frequently observant of things happening outside the tank. This feature works so well that it actually causes me problems lol. When preparing bearded dragon food, the bearded dragon can recognize it from quite far away and run towards it, scratching against the glass. This forces me to hide food items. Please consider this a compliment, developers.
I know that the quote is: “If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it,” and you’ve definitely applied this mantra to your development of the bearded dragon. Unfortunately, your technology is still very outdated and needs to be updated immediately. I’d put you a step above the notoriously bad Koala model of mammal, so take that as a compliment. Regardless, I have greatly enjoyed your bearded dragon model regardless of its flaws, which - in truth - I find quite amusing. So go ahead and fix your next models, but I’m happy to keep my current one as long as I have it.
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